I’m sorry i’ve not been a better friend to you. I know that you consider me your best friend and your inspiration for your trip. But I consider you another boy who fell in love with me when they shouldn’t have and then labelled it “best friends” whilst they carried on their relationship with another girl.

You are just another Dann, and he is just another you. 

I’m sorry that I don’t like any of your girlfriends. But what do you expect when each one of them has been, quite frankly, a weirdo? They aren’t deserving of you and for God’s sake, you allow yourself to get into these stupid relationships that aren’t even real. 

Then you expect me to pick up the pieces.

I’m sorry that i’m not enthusiastic about your trip to Africa. I just can’t find it in my heart to jump for joy whilst you do something we planned to do together. Something I can’t do anymore. I’m sorry, so sorry, but it hurts me too much for me to even pretend to be happy. I’ve put on a brave face and done the best I can. But its causing me physical pain to think you are doing what I lay awake at night picturing myself doing. 

So I hope you achieve what you want in Uganda, I hope you have an amazing time.

But its making me jealous - its making me hurt, its making me devastated that i’m not still out in the real world, working with poverty.

I’m just sorry.